Derp. A word that has been included in my life way too much in the past week or so. Derp. It’s what I say when I do something stupid, make something awkward, like tripping or making a dumb mistake. These things happen to me. A lot. But today was the day where the most derp moments happened in record time.
I went to a fast food restaurant for dinner with a friend from dance. So she orders and all is well. I walk up to the counter and I say “I want the grilled chicken burger,” and the lady did not understand me. Derp #1.
So I pointed and made a weird gesture toward the picture of the burger (derp #2) and said it again. Then she asks what I want to drink. I didn’t order a drink. In fact I was holding a drink from another restaurant. Derp #3.
Then I reach into my wallet to pay. I left my money in another establishment. Derp #4.
So I borrow money from my friend. Then while the lady’s walking around getting our food I say “Thank-you,” and the lady thought I was thanking her and she responded with “You’re welcome.” Derp #5.
The lady then gives me the change, but they’re out of pennies so she states that she’ll be right back with two more pennies. She never did give us those pennies. Derp #6 & 7.
Then the food was put out on two trays, mine was to-go and the other food wasn’t, when it was specified that it was to-go. Derp #8.
Then the lady started reaching around all over the place and I couldn’t grab my food. Derp #9.
Then my friend asks for ketchup for her fries, and the lady hands her one single packet. Derp #10.
So that was ten whole awkward moments in the span of one minute. That’s one derp every 6 seconds! Try and beat that wickedly awkward record!